Boy, that title sounds down right depressing.
This may come as a shocker, I know it did for me, but the truth is that no matter whom you marry, there will be problems.
Some people hit these problems and think that escaping them is the best solution. They leave the relationship, “find themselves”, and then work to build a new relationship. The trouble is that the new relationship will have problems as well, abet different problems, and the couple is back to square one.
The real solution is for couples to learn to work through problems, which in turn edifies both people involved. Typically the first problem that couples have involves pet peeves, and in truth all of us have or do something that irritates other people. Learning to work on oneself is always harder than picking apart the faults of another person.
A marriage therapist once said, “choosing a partner is choosing a set of problems,” and I would go on to say that road travels both ways, each person has problems.Wallace Goddard wrote in Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage, “It takes strength of character to see errors in a partner’s grammar or perceptions and yet resist the temptation to correct needlessly. It takes godly goodness to see weakness and mistakes in our partners and yet resist the temptation to smirk. It takes heavenly humility to be proven right and yet to meekly acknowledge that we all makes mistakes. It takes divine grace to discard or limit the hobbies that prevent us for helping around the house.” What what?!? That means I am a better person, a more Godlike person, if I resist the my initial impulse to do evil?! Absolutely. Regardless of what my spouse is doing, I will be better off becoming an expert in dealing with marital challenges.
So if your marriage has problems, take heart, so does everyone else’s. Take the challenge to become an expert, working on your problems first.
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